The Plea for Unconditional Sight

I'm a perpetual work-in-progress,
Please understand,
I am trying my best to be the best I can.

Be patient with me,
Soon you will see,
I can be the woman you need me to be.

I'm not like him,
I am not a jerk.
I have my jerk moments,
But I never intend to hurt.

My mouth moves
my brain does not think
and in the process
my words wound
and both our hearts sink.

I'm not always smart,
You must understand,
I love you with all my heart
I just have some issues at hand.

I have found the trigger
To the "why" of why I am the way I am.
I found out why
I have a tendency to be like that man.

Everyone has their issues,
I admit mine.
He is my issue,
and I am working to get by.

This is not a fight I can win on my own
I need your help;
I can't face this alone.
The road ahead is long,
The issues can not be ignored.
The mountain I face can not be tackled alone.

I am not asking you to solve my problems,
But please,
Just hold my hand.
My life has not been easy,
You are the one thing is this world I can understand.

Still learning each other.
You and I.
Still a long road ahead,
But together we can get by.

The path is uncertain,
The future unclear.
What ever is ahead,
Just stand with me and face it, My Dear.

I love you more than this world could ever know,
I love you more than anyone I have ever known.

Before you,
all I would say is,
"If they can't handle me at my worst,
then they should not stay."
You have stayed,
even on my worst days,
You have loved me,
even when my words made you want to stray.
For you I will face the issues I have.
For you and for I
Will I see to the problem at hand.
Just be with me.
Be by my side.
Please, let me be yours,
And please always be mine.
I can't do this alone,
I need you and God on my side.

Just hold me when I scream.
Then I will most likely cry,
For when I yell,
I am the most vulnerable.
When I hurt,
It is not because I hate.
When I hurt,
It is because my heart is afraid to ache from pain.
When I am happy,
Then there is a chance of hurt.
My father kicks in,
And I lash before the other has a chance to hurt.

I will work through my issues,
But I need you by my side.
I can't do this alone.
I need your love and your patience to help me get by.

The road ahead will be long,
But I love you with all my being,
and that's why I care enough to change the bad side of my soul
to the good love you first witnessed inside my fragile soul.